Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
The doctor said that if they accidentally damage my nerve endings I could permanently lose feeling in my lower jaw.. Honestly the first thing that came to mind was how that would affect my blowjob skills.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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