4 words: hood of his car
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
