Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
even my farts smell like vagina
The bridesmaids just went smackdown on the floor, over the bouquet. I saw nipple. Best wedding ever
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
You know the party's good when you say "Never have I ever caused an emergency landing" and someone drinks
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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