do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
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