My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
CTFD. There’s plenty of dick in the sea! This is Vegas, we import dick. \nWorst case scenario we get a rental penis
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