I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
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