Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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