my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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