You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
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