You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
Randomize
