Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize
