You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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