He is such a slut. More and more my type.
The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
this is honestly why we're friends. we drink tea and plan to do drugs together.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
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