she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
LMAO I like how "don't worry I'll bring chasers" is your way of assuring things will be ok
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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