Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Yeah no shit. My mom is giving me winecoolers as we watch a show abt alcoholics
here I sit at Southern Illinois' finest pubs and I thought I heard your laugh. I was sadly astonished to turn and find a midget cracking herself up reading the label on her can of chewing tobacco...
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize