i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Came home and the girl was sitting on the steps "talking" on her ipod touch AND was halfway done eating a raw cucumber.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
CUTE BOY IN THE OFFICE WALKED BY AS I WAS STARING IN HORROR AT HARRY POTTER THEMED SKELETON PORN
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's
Spent 38 bucks on dollar wells last night. I'm pretty sure my liver is staging a mutiny right now.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize