I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Randomize