You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
