Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
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