Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
True strength comes from lack of pants
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
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