i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I apparently asked the cab driver to show us his dick and then he showed me a picture of his girlfriend
I licked your asshole in confidence.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Randomize
