brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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