I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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