My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Randomize