when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
