just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
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