Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
GLITTER SLIP N SLIDE MUTHAFUCKAH~
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
Randomize