You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
How do you say "I always respond to booty calls" when you give a guy your number?
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
