Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
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