I don't think brook has ever known best
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Just threw up in nordstroms while shopping for moms bday with dad. He distracted workers for me. No more tequila
That combination of brocholi bacon eggs cheese ketchup and pasta would have been a revaltion had you not thrown up on the stove and put out the pilot light
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
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