dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
there's a taquito in the driveway. If it's not yours I'm going to eat it.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize