Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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