Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
