Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
if only i could text you this smell
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Just got into a fight with a trashcan, today is obviously not going to be my day.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
