well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Lesbians just stole my cat :(
Randomize
