Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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