its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
Has my life seriously led me to day drinking on a Monday the third week of the semester?
It's after 5, it's not day drinking.
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
If you don't ever hear from me again, just know that I loved you
Jesus Christ that's like a real possibility
Some male strippers are here, I threw pancakes at them. It's ok
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Randomize
