He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
she looked like the before picture.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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