woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
the guy at the pet shop just had an eye seizure while looking at my chest
and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I know I come to this conclusion on a fairly regular basis but I really do need a babysitter
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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