ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
I just fucked 3 marines at the same time...how did you celebrate veterans day?
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
Randomize
