Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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