would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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