I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
IM AT A ROOFTOP FUNDRAISER LOOKING OVER THE WHITE HOUSE I WILL NOT RUIN MYSELF
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize
