suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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