Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
THERE IS NOT ENOUGH CAPSLOCK IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD TO EXPRESS MY CURRENT STATE OF WHAT THE FUCK JUST HAPPENED
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
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