im about as happy as oj after his trial
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Randomize
