I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I think they can follow the trail of blood to my house if they have a problem with me taking a dip in their hot tub last night b4 stepping on a broken bottle
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize