why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Just saw out breathalyzer tubes from last night on the side of the road. Glad the cop let us know that they are biodegradable
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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