It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Just cropdusted the office
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize
