Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
and you fell through a lawn chair
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
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